Did you know I’m a knitter?
I love knitting. My oldest witch friend in the world, Jackie, taught me how to knit when I was 24 or 25.
I can still see us sitting on her couch, as she patiently showed me where to place the left-hand needle and how to throw the yarn.
At home, I had to concentrate SO hard, to make sure I wasn’t knitting extra stitches. My first “scarf” looked more like a trapezoid.
My hands hurt like a MOFO. I remember thinking, WTactualF???
This went on for a good two months. And yet, I stuck with it.
I guess I intuitively knew that when it finally clicked, the payoff would be the brain buzzing that’s more satisfying than any chemical high I’ve ever had.
AND… the finished objects. Oh, the dopamine hit of the finished object!
Then there’s THIS shawl.
I have a confession: I frickin‘ hated knitting this shawl.
It feels so weird to say that… but… #truth.
THIS shawl was a pain in the butt. I can’t remember WHY it was a pain, but I do remember thinking, good GOD, when will this be OVER??
I almost let it go completely. It’s not like you HAVE to finish everything you start.
And it’s not like I’m attached to the work I’ve put in. I’ve got zero problems pulling it all out and starting again.
(Leland will tell you that if I find a mistake that’s 10, 20 or even 30 rows back… if it’s even remotely noticeable, I will take the piece off the needles and rip away until it’s GONE.)
I love the finished object. I knit because I WANT the thing. So I finish just about every project I start.
But this one was HARD. It took for-FING-ever and at a certain point I was all, “I’m so over you.”
Then it sat there for another TWO MONTHS before I blocked it. (Blocking is a simple finishing process that takes a piece of knitting from “wrinkled old man” to “baby’s bum-bum,” like you see in the picture.)
When I finally pulled it off the blocking mats, I be like…. good riddance.
I mean, this is kinda hilarious, right?
But that’s what it’s like for some of us. We want things NOW or five minutes from now, and when we don’t get it, we go all petulant child.
DAYS later… I put it on.
It was the perfect length. Not-too-long, not-too-short. The perfect softness. The perfect DRAPE.
(If you’re a knitter, drape is A Thing.)
Sometimes, we don’t KNOW – with our “thinking minds” – why we’re Doing The Thing. We just know that we need to do the thing.
Sometimes, the FRUITS of our conscious co-creation practice aren’t gonna SHOW UP right away.
Sometimes – oh no wait – all the time – there are things happening and shifting… that you CAN’T see, that you will NOT see… for a long time.
Sometimes we have to SLOW the fudge DOWN, and take it at the pace that the payoff demands.
Sometimes… we don’t get to that payoff for a WHILE. We don’t get the dopamine hit. We just get the slog. For a LONG time.
And yet you’re being asked to take action anyway.
You’re being asked to stay in the room and keep doing the things you would be doing because that’s who you Be and that’s what you Do.
I knit. I just do.
Sure, I put it down when Brigit was born. But when I finally picked it up again, my first thought was, WTF was I thinking?
I always have time. And I will never put it down again.
I knit. I just do. Can’t not.
It’s a thing.
“Knitter” is a part of my IDENTITY… and that was a very, very conscious identity construction.
I had no idea why I chose it, and the DOING of it was a total pain in the butt, but I did it anyway.
Because I couldn’t NOT.
Sometimes… your Highest Level – aka your DIVINE NATURE – has plans that you can’t see yet.
And manifesting your biggest goals – especially in the realm of money – will always demand that you BE the Version of You That Already Has It.
One of our Highest Level Leaders is celebrating $58k in sales in November. She’ll easily do that again next month. But that’s NOT why it’s remarkable.
SHE is remarkable because for FIVE MONTHS, she went through offer after offer after offer.
Some bombed, miserably. Every single one got her closer to the one that didn’t bomb.
Meanwhile, she had low money months. Old money struggles were all up in her face ALL THE TIME.
And yet, NOT ONCE did she make excuses, or even make a late payment to us.
She kept following WHO she is, and what she KNOWS she’s meant to be doing.
The thing that’s selling so well now… well, it’s just who she is. It’s what she do. She’d do it for fun because it IS fun.
It’s how she do.
Confession: I fricking HATED kitting this shawl.
But it turned out to be my current Best Thing I’ve Ever Made.
It’s just how I do.